Reading time: 11 minutes
Narcissists carry an unreal sense of entitlement—they believe they deserve special treatment wherever they go.They can instantly give up their cool front and retaliate at the hint of even the slightest ill-treatment. And they won’t stop until they have belittled you.
- Most narcissists strongly believe that they are superior to everyone else and can do no wrong. So, in all arguments, you have to accede that they are Mr./Ms. Always Right.
- They can methodically gaslight you into believing that you are insane. Worse, they can ruthlessly abuse you when you are at your weakest.
- Narcissistic people often hide their true toxic persona until they have charmed you. When you see one of them trying to get close to you, get away as fast as you can.
These factual quotes (mostly from experts on narcissism) will expose them.
25 Cold, Insightful Narcissist Quotes
Psychologist Scott Barry Kaufman confirms that narcissists know they are narcissists:
“Narcissists think they are hot stuff. Those scoring high in narcissism measures tended to rate themselves as more intelligent, physically attractive, likeable, and funny than others. Interestingly, they also rated themselves as … being power-oriented, impulsive, arrogant, and prone to exaggerate their abilities. In other words, narcissists are aware that they are narcissists.”
— Scott Barry Kaufman
You will find these quotes on narcissists and narcissism quite revelatory:
Shahida Arabi’s research found that “both vulnerable and grandiose narcissism and psychopathy can significantly and uniquely contribute to PTSD symptomatology related to the relationship.”
1. Narcissists are like tornadoes: wherever they go, they leave a path of destruction behind them.
— Shahida Arabi
2. Love doesn’t die a natural death. Love has to be killed, either by neglect or narcissism.
— Frank Salvato
This study found narcissism was related to all forms of aggression — indirect, direct, displaced, physical, verbal, and bullying. It is also related to both reactive and proactive aggression. The relationship between narcissism and aggression was noticeable in men and women of all ages.
3. “Individuals high in narcissism have ‘thin skins’ and are prone to aggression when they are provoked. Practically, these results suggest that narcissism is an important risk factor for aggression and violence.”
— Kjærvik & Bushman (2021)
4. How starved you must have been that my heart became a meal for your ego?
— Amanda Torroni
[Why Are Narcissists Insecure: 10 Reasons Unveiling Their Fragility]
5. They barrel through life, using relationships and people as objects, tools, and folly. While they often seem as if they are cruel or harsh, that is in fact giving them too much credit. They are simply careless. And they do expect other people to clean up their messes.
— Ramani Durvasula, Ph.D., author of Should I Stay Or Should I Go?
6. Since narcissists deep down feel themselves to be faultless, it is inevitable that when they are in conflict with the world, they will invariably perceive the conflict as the world’s fault.
— M. Scott Peck
7. Narcissism includes self-absorption, self-love, and self-aggrandizement as attempts to gratify infantile needs.
— Sigmund Freud
8. Americans are experiencing an epidemic in narcissistic behavior in a culture that is intrinsically self-conscious and selfish, and citizens are encouraged to pursue happiness and instant gratification of their personal desires.
— Kilroy Oldster, Author of Dead Toad Scrolls
9. When I look at narcissism through the vulnerability lens, I see the shame-based fear of being ordinary. I see the fear of never feeling extraordinary enough to be noticed, to be lovable, to belong, or to cultivate a sense of purpose.
― Brené Brown, author of Daring Greatly
10. The narcissist’s greatest fear is being exposed for who they truly are: empty, devoid of empathy, and desperate for validation.
― Dr. Ramani Durvasula
11. The main condition for the achievement of love is the overcoming of one’s narcissism. The narcissistic orientation is one in which one experiences as real only that which exists within oneself, while the phenomena in the outside world have no reality in themselves, but are experienced only from the viewpoint of their being useful or dangerous to one. The opposite pole to narcissism is objectivity; it is the faculty to see other people and things as they are, objectively, and to be able to separate this objective picture from a picture which is formed by one’s desires and fears.
― Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
12. Narcissists manipulate you with the two things they know you need the most: respect and validation.
— Unknown
13. Narcissists are consumed with maintaining a shallow false self to others. They’re emotionally crippled souls that are addicted to attention. Because of this, they use a multitude of games, in order to receive adoration. Sadly, they are the most ungodly of God’s creations because they don’t show remorse for their actions, take steps to make amends or have empathy for others. They are morally bankrupt.
― Shannon L. Alder
14. Narcissists don’t love themselves. They love the grand image of themselves that they’ve created.
— Unknown
15. Pathological narcissists can lose touch with reality in subtle ways that become extremely dangerous over time. When they can’t let go of their need to be admired or recognized, they have to bend or invent a reality in which they remain special despite all messages to the contrary.
― Bandy X Lee, The Dangerous Case of Donald Trump: 27 Psychiatrists and Mental Health Experts Assess a President
16. The sadistic narcissist perceives himself as Godlike, ruthless and devoid of scruples, capricious and unfathomable, emotion-less and non-sexual, omniscient, omnipotent and omnipresent, a plague, a devastation, an inescapable verdict.
― Sam Vaknin, renowned expert on NPD, author of Malignant Self-Love: Narcissism Revisited
17. Narcissists will destroy your life, erode your self-esteem, and do it with such stealth as to make you feel that you are the one that’s crazy.
— Rhonda Freeman
18. Self-love: Being content with the work-in-progress you are. Not seeking approval from others. Being yourself. Comparing yourself only to who you were in the past, not to others. Not thinking you are better than anyone else. Narcissism: None of the above.
— Zero Dean, author and life coach
19. Narcissism is the enemy of empathy.
— Simon Baron-Cohen
20. Realize that narcissists have an addiction disorder. They are strongly addicted to feeling significant. Like any addict they will do whatever it takes to get this feeling often. That is why they are manipulative and future fakers. They promise change, but can’t deliver if it interferes with their addiction. That is why they secure backup supply.
― Shannon L. Alder
21. A healthy dose of narcissism can facilitate career success, because reasonable concern with the self helps a person think of achieving important goals and being admired as a leader. The moderately narcissistic person often appears to be self-confident and charismatic. Yet extreme narcissism can hamper success because the narcissist irritates and alienates others in the workplace as well as in personal life.
― Andrew DuBrin
22. Narcissists are obsessed with projecting a false self-image to others. They’re emotionally crippled souls so addicted to attention that they must live a fake life much larger than themselves.
— Unknown
23. Narcissism is the art of deception, where the narcissist creates an illusion that she is something she is not, in order to get what she wants.
— W. Keith Campbell
24. “Narcissism is the antithesis of leadership, because leadership is all about others.
— Denise Morrison
25. Narcissism falls along the axis of what psychologists call personality disorders, one of a group that includes antisocial, dependent, histrionic, avoidant and borderline personalities. But by most measures, narcissism is one of the worst, if only because the narcissists themselves are so clueless.
— Jeffrey Kluger
A classic gaslighting technique used by narcissists to invalidate other people’s feelings and emotions is this: “You’re just being too sensitive.” If you are not sure you can spot a narcissist, check out the 20 Signs and Red flags of Narcissism.
Understanding Modern Narcissists: An Ultra-Short Primer
- Experts suggest that all of us may have some degree of narcissism.
- Narcissism is a stable personality trait ranging from mild to extreme, with only the extreme cases considered a disorder (NPD). So, narcissism is a spectrum rather than a binary trait,
- About 5% of the population has narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).
- The perception of narcissists has shifted from merely vain and self-absorbed to cold-hearted and emotionally harmful.
- The hallmark trait of narcissists is a lack of compassionate empathy, regardless of intentions.
- Narcissists may have good intentions, but struggle to respond to others’ feelings with care and kindness.
- Healthy narcissists may have a positive self-image and realistic self-awareness.
- Toxic narcissists often take credit for shared successes while blaming others for failures.
- In Freudian theory, narcissism is linked to excessive self-esteem and emotional immaturity (expressing emotions without restraint or context).
- The American Psychiatric Association defines narcissism as a “grandiose sense of self-importance, a preoccupation with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love.”
The Female Narcissist
- The DSM definition of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) may be gender-biased. It may be the cause of the over-diagnosis of male narcissists and the under-diagnosis of female narcissists, with added effects from social stereotypes about gender roles and behaviors.
- The DSM definition leans towards diagnosing grandiose narcissism, often associated with men, while overlooking vulnerable narcissism, which may be more prevalent in women.
- Males are more prone to be diagnosed with NPD due to their grandiose appearance of narcissism, while females’ vulnerable narcissism may often be misdiagnosed as Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD).
- Males and females may develop different strategies to compensate for a lack of empathetic responses from the mother, leading to different manifestations of narcissism.
- Research suggests that males often display more features of grandiose narcissism and females present with vulnerable features, possibly reflecting gendered socialization processes and parental styles.
- There are gender differences in narcissism related to aggression and self-esteem, with males often reporting higher on these domains than women.
- Women with higher levels of narcissism have demonstrated significantly higher levels of hostile and angry communication patterns.
- Narcissistic females may pursue their narcissistic goals in more discreet and indirect ways compared to their male counterparts.
Read: 20 Typical Female Narcissist Cheating Patterns
What are a female narcissist’s favorite sayings?
Female narcissists may use a variety of sayings to manipulate and control others, depending on their personality and individual style. Here are some common phrases female narcissists may use:
•“You’re just jealous.” — A typical female narcissistic quote that dismisses criticism or negative feedback by accusing others of being envious of them.
•“You’re lucky to have me.” — Narcissists often believe that they are superior to others and that people should be grateful to be in their presence.
•“I don’t need anyone else.” — Female narcissists may use this phrase to convey a sense of independence and self-sufficiency, while also suggesting that others are not needed or valued.
•“I deserve the best.” — Female narcissists say this to assert their sense of entitlement and make sure they deserve special treatment or privileges.
•“It’s all your fault. I’m the victim here.” — Female narcissists rarely take responsibility for their actions and may play the victim card to gain sympathy while blaming others for their problems and mistakes.
Do narcissistic people love?
Narcissistic people may claim to love, but their love is often conditional and self-serving. They are more focused on getting their own needs met rather than genuinely caring for their partner’s well-being. Their behavior is often driven by their insecurities and needs for validation.
Final Words
A strange behavior of narcissists: They cannot hear you praising people; they must quickly pull them down. If they can’t, they’ll be irritable until they can belittle that person’s achievement.
If you’re dealing with a narcissist, do not convince yourself that you can change them for the better. You cannot.
Let’s end this with a quote from one of the highest authorities on psychological disorders:
Narcissistic personality disorder is named for Narcissus, from Greek mythology, who fell in love with his own reflection. Freud used the term to describe persons who were self-absorbed, and psychoanalysts have focused on the narcissist’s need to bolster his or her self-esteem through grandiose fantasy, exaggerated ambition, exhibitionism, and feelings of entitlement.
― Donald W. Black, DSM-5(r) Guidebook: The Essential Companion to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition
√ Also Read: What Happens When A Narcissist Knows You Love Him/Her
√ Please spread the word if you found this helpful.
• Our Story!