Quiz: How Jealous Are You? (Romantic Jealousy Facts)

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Jealousy is the fear of losing what you own. Romantic jealousy is the fear of losing a partner to someone else, whether real or imagined.

Romantic jealousy can be understood in two ways: as reactive, which is driven by emotions, and as anxious, which is more cognitive in nature.

Romantic jealousy is a normal emotional response, but it can become problematic when excessive or uncontrolled. Its negative emotional reactions, like rage, stress, resentment, or hurtful behavior, can negatively affect relationships and the emotional well-being of both partners.

Its common trigger is an actual or imagined relationship outside the main partnership. It can also be based on a belief that a second relationship might happen in the future.

The two most commonly used jealousy scales worldwide are:

Multidimensional Jealousy Scale (MJS) by Pfeiffer and Wong (1989)
Revised Anticipated Jealousy Scale (RASJS) by Buunk (1997)

3 Aspects of Jealousy

Cognitive Jealousy (CJ): Suspicions and worries about a partner’s interest in a rival and the interest received from a rival.
Emotional Jealousy (EJ): Emotional disturbance that a person feels when faced with a jealousy-triggering situation.
Behavioral Jealousy (BJ): Actions a person takes to protect their relationship or investigate their partner, such as monitoring their partner’s phone or questioning their locations.

Now check your jealousy score:

Quiz: How Jealous Are You? A Quick Check!

Courtesy: Based on the Italian version of the Multidimensional Jealousy Scale (MJS) by Pfeiffer and Wong (1989). Source: Validation study of the Italian brief version of the multidimensional jealousy scale.

Think of a person with whom you are having or have had a strong romantic/love relationship. The person is referred to as X in this questionnaire. There are no right or wrong answers. Choose your best response to the following questions. (Note: CJ = Cognitive Jealousy; EJ = Emotional Jealousy; BJ = Behavioral Jealousy.)

How often do you have the following thoughts about X?

1. I am worried that someone may be chasing after X (CJ).

2. I suspect that X may be attracted to someone else (CJ).

3. I think that someone else might be romantically interested in X (CJ).

4. I am worried that someone else is trying to seduce X (CJ).

5. I suspect that X is crazy about someone else (CJ).

How would you emotionally react to the following situations?

6. X comments to you on how great looking a particular person is (EJ).

7. X smiles in a very friendly manner at someone else (EJ).

8. Someone else is trying to get close to X all the time (EJ).

9. X hugs and kisses someone else (EJ).

10. X works very closely with another person (in school or office) (EJ).

How often do you engage in the following behaviors?

11. I look through X’s drawers, handbag, or pockets (BJ).

12. I question X about previous or present romantic relationships (BJ).

13. I say something nasty about someone else if X shows an interest in that person (BJ).

14. I question X about his or her telephone calls (BJ).

15. I join in whenever I see X talking closely to someone else (BJ).

Your Jealousy Scores:

Cognitive Jealousy (CJ) Score: /35

Emotional Jealousy (EJ) Score: /35

Behavioral Jealousy (BJ) Score: /35

Total Jealousy Score: /105

Score Interpretation:

Total Score 15-45: Low Jealousy
You generally experience low levels of romantic jealousy. Note: Score for each item ranged from 1 to 7. Cognitive Jealousy subscale items (questions 1-5) are reverse-scored.
Total Score 46-75: Moderate Jealousy
You may experience moderate levels of romantic jealousy in certain situations. Note: Score for each item ranged from 1 to 7. Cognitive Jealousy subscale items (questions 1-5) are reverse-scored.
Total Score 76-105: High Jealousy
Your score suggests you may be experiencing significant feelings of romantic jealousy. Note: Score for each item ranged from 1 to 7. Cognitive Jealousy subscale items (questions 1-5) are reverse-scored.

Note: This scale is for educational purposes only and not a diagnostic tool. If you’re experiencing feelings of jealousy that are significantly impacting your relationship or well-being, please consider speaking with a mental health professional.

Psychology of Jealousy

Romantic jealousy is recognized as one of the most frequent issues faced by couples in romantic relationships (Miller et al., 2014; Zusman and Knox, 1998).
Some potential outcomes of jealousy, such as separation or divorce, are some of the most stressful life events (Holmes & Rahe, 1967).
From an evolutionary standpoint, romantic jealousy alerts individuals to potential threats to their relationships, motivating them to take action to prevent their partner from leaving (Buss, 1994). This instinct increases the chances of survival for both individuals and their offspring (Fisher, 2000).
Research indicates that the likelihood of experiencing romantic jealousy rises when relationship rewards are seen as at risk and when aspects of one's self-concept feel challenged by a rival (Social-Cognitive Theory of Jealousy; Harris, 2003).
A German study involving 85 romantic couples suggests that individuals with higher self-compassion are less likely to experience romantic jealousy (Tandler & Petersen, 2020).

What Causes Jealousy?

Marazziti & Sbrana (2010) found that jealousy is closely related to the following five factors:

Low Self-Esteem: Individuals with low self-esteem often feel insecure (that their partner will leave them for someone better), making them feel jealous.
Paranoia: High levels of paranoia can lead to jealousy by triggering distrust and suspicion. A paranoid person may constantly worry that their partner is being unfaithful or is interested in someone else, which can intensify jealous feelings.
High Sensitivity: Those with high interpersonal sensitivity may be more attuned to their partner's interactions with others, leading to increased jealousy. They might interpret neutral or friendly behaviors as threats, making them jealous even in benign situations.
Fear of Abandonment: This factor is directly linked to jealousy, as individuals who fear abandonment may become jealous when they perceive a potential threat to their relationship. This fear can lead to possessive behaviors and heightened emotional responses to perceived rivalries.
Obsessionality: Obsessiveness can show up as obsessive thoughts about a partner's loyalty or their attention to others. High levels of obsessionality may lead one to fixate on their partner's interactions, leading to irrational jealousy and controlling behaviors.

In summary, a person more likely to feel jealousy will typically have low self-esteem, high paranoia, high interpersonal sensitivity, high obsessiveness, or a fear of abandonment.

Final Words

Jealousy can have both personal and social consequences.

Intense and uncontrollable jealousy can lead to anger and harmful behavior directed at the partner or loved one, or the person they perceive as a threat or rival to the exclusive relationship.
Extreme jealousy can even lead to murder (Evzonas, 2018).
Despite its negative aspects, jealousy can also serve a positive purpose by protecting a relationship and preventing outside interference (Chung and Harris, 2018).

Recent research suggests that instead of treating jealousy as healthy or unhealthy, it may be more accurate to view it on a spectrum, ranging from normal to pathological (Tandler & Petersen, 2020).

√ Also Read: Quiz: How Optimistic Are You? A Quick Check!

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